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Monday, August 14, 2006

Feeling Cranky

The crankiness meter is off the charts today.
Maybe I’m suffering from an overdose of overcast.
The sun has taken leave and my mood is starting to be seriously affected.

It’s been weeks of one glorious, pristine blue skies and blinding sun kinda day and six of dreary, thick-as-glue clouds alternating with pelting rain. Don’t get me wrong, I like the sound of rain, under certain circumstances like lying in bed in the afternoon with a summer rain showering down and the ceiling fan fanning laziness overhead mixing the humid air just enough to make skin against skin bearable but not enough to flutter sweat-dampened bangs stuck to his forehead or cool wet tongue tracks along the small of my back… but I digress…

Mother Nature must be seriously pissed at something 'coz her wrath is relentless.
That’s a good word.
In honor of my crankiness, I’m gonna tell you a few things that bug the crap out of me today.

I hate wearing glasses.
More than wearing them, I hate the fact that I NEED to wear glasses to properly see the computer screen. Nobody knows that.

I hate that my shoulder feels like there’s a needle stuck inside when I sit down to work at said computer screen. And neither the physical therapist nor the chiropractor nor the massage therapist nor the acupuncturist can offer a permanent solution.

I hate living in a world that, some days, still feels completely foreign to me.

I hate that we give so much damn visibility to people like Brittney Spears.

I hate what I’m having for lunch today.

I hate the fact that you (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE) have so easily distanced yourself from me and I’ll never know if it was a conscious decision or simply a coincidence that life got so busy that you unplugged everything, including me. Was the extraction effortless or did you give it a second thought? You say it’s not personal, but damn, after everything we’ve said to each other, suddenly being you-less sure feels personal. Either you were/are much less invested than I was/am or you’ve found another “distraction”.

I hate the color gray – the kind I keep trying to hide with highlights and the kind hiding the sun.

I hate that in 6 days I will be 27.
Maybe you didn’t hear me…

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